Eggcorns and Mondegreens

by Max Madman & The Heck Yeahs

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Eggcorns and Mondegreens tells the story of Louis Samson and Delores Pierre (Louie and Lola), childhood friends who become lovers in high school. Their relationship is beautiful and chaotic but they grow apart in their early twenties, ultimately spending a significant portion of their adult lives apart from one another. In their forties, they both suffer from depression and experience simultaneous mid-life crises: Louie becomes an alcoholic and Lola attempts to commit suicide. During their respective recoveries, they get back in touch and discover a mutual fondness for their teenage romance. Louie and Lola fall back in love, growing old together until Louie passes away.


released January 20, 2017

Eggcorns and Mondegreens was composed, performed, recorded and mixed by Max Tulysewski between the ages of 17 and 22 at his family home in the Adelaide Hills.

Additional musicians:
Kyle Opie - guitar (tracks 1, 2 & 4), co-writer (track 2)
Dylan Oke - drums (track 1)
Craig Burns - drums (track 7)

Artwork by Zinia King.
Black marker by Max.
Photo by Hugh Martin.

Max would like to thank:
Robyn Habel for the generous advice and guidance, The Heck Yeahs (Dylan Oke, Will Hoskin, Grace Tulysewski, Kyle Opie and Tim Moors) for helping me find my music and all the wild shows, Lachy Bruce at Open Grave Records for believing in this band, Nick Gates, Liam Gare, the T.F.U. and the rest of my dear friends for the ongoing support and love, Mum and Dad, I love you. Thanks. xx



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Max Madman & The Heck Yeahs Adelaide, Australia

Young Adult Fiction

Power Pop

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Track Name: Overture: Louie & Lola (Pt. 1)
I think we met at a grown-up party; my dad and her dad were friends. We ran off and made our own fun, I distinctly remember what I said. “Hi, my name is Louie and what is yours, my dear? You are everything and anything. Oh darling, your eyes look like danger.” Lola dear, I need you more. Kiss me here while the rain falls. We could throw parties and grow old together and fight and yell and scream and be mad at each other. Then, when we wake up and bite on the bullet, we’ll taste last night’s ammo every time we talk. I want you to annoy the shit out of me, I want us to be passionate and stupidly in love and I want you for the rest of my life. I’ll go outside and light up a cigarette. You stay inside and paint me a portrait. I love our own little West Coast scenario and I fucking love you, I’m not afraid to say. What else is there anyway? Oh darling, what else is there anyway?
Track Name: Curious Minds at Hutt River Camp
We sit close on the bank of the river, snuck out while the others had dinner. We tug at grass and I see you shiver, offer my coat but you just move nearer. School camp, log cabins, rosy cheeks, sunset, no parents for a week. I like your eyes when you smile, I like your mouth when you speak. I know we’re far too young to understand how love works. I know it’s not the time to tell you that I’m nervous. I know that you can see it in my eyes but you kiss me on the cheek and put your fingers in mine. Write me a love song, make it real, make it dissonant. Make me feel how you felt when you wrote it. Make it short, make it loud, make it yours.
Track Name: Do You Think I'm Spooky?
How strange, would you believe me if I said that I don’t remember the last ten minutes? One moment, sitting, eating, staring at the clock and in a bright flash of light, I saw it stop. The next thing I knew, I woke up beside you in a single bed in your parents’ house. I don’t feel sad, I just feel a bit sick. Would you mind if I stayed another night? Do you believe in aliens, the occult or U.F.O.s? I hope you don’t think I’m crazy, but I’m not sure that I know. The first time we kissed I forgot my name and I’m scared, oh god, it’s true. Maybe I was never abducted; I just fell in love with you. In spilled sugar, draw a diagram to show all the ways that I know might explain. This late night diner feels funny to me and I can’t stop my hands from shaking. It’s easy to discount paranormal activity sightings as mental illness. Last night, as I slept, I felt a warm breath on the side of my neck and a hand on my chest.
Track Name: Bored Girls
The sunrise hits the charcoaled remains of the fireplace; empty bottles rest with the silent air that fills their space. Bored girls and urban myths, wet grass and bottle caps, drunk boys with bloody fists, bed hair and photographs. I wake up, grab a towel and wipe the dirt from my face. Chaotic and lifeless, the backyard hums to the tune of last night's fervor. Bruised lips and a black eye; smeared lipstick and a heavy sigh. I know that you're bored, you've been watching the clock for the whole night. And, my mouth tastes of hope from the secrets I told you while we sat behind the shed and lost a whole night by ourselves.
Track Name: The Post-Teenage Adolescent
Lonely and hung-over again, de-hydrated in my single bed. Type and re-type without pressing send, love sonnets to you and all your friends. I’ve lied before, but I can’t remember what I lied about. I’ve made people cry without knowing why. I’m a lazy lovelorn balladeer. I can’t function knowing you’re not here. I hate how I get so caught up in every little thing you do, I wish we could get lost and I could love every inch of you. I’m lonely by choice, but I fall in love every day. I’m 20 years old, but I haven’t changed the world at all. I’m drowning in a bilge of irony, I’m a post-teenage adolescent.
Track Name: Better Than Me
When all is said and done, who has really won? I still remember the taste of her salty tears as I kissed her face. I looked in her eyes and she whispered to me that I’d feel the pain eventually but I never cried, it just felt right and now she’s moving on. I have come undone. I’ve read a book that you’re about to read. I’ve seen a film that you’re about to see. I loved a girl who you’re about to love. Please treat her well, be better than me. I know young love is doomed, just two kids in a room. We never aspired to be anything more than a pursuit. It’s true that I cared about her and I will always love her, I think about her still. She’s found a new guy, I guess that’s life. But, I’ve got feelings too. I am happy for you. I hope you never break her heart. I hope she never destroys you. If it goes wrong, you drift apart. It’s in our nature to get through.
Track Name: Little Miss Fortune
I always liked the way you wear your heart on your sleeve. These stains in my shirt, this food in my teeth. I hear you got out of hospital, I’m sorry I never called or wrote you a letter, I hope you’re feeling better. Why do you always get like this? You know I’d really miss you. You always get like this. You are my little miss fortune. I always liked the way you say “thank you” when I say that you are strange. I wish you’d told me about the drugs and the disorder but I’m glad your self-destructive plans fell through. And, I’m alone in my bed wondering if you’re dead. I’m alone, I spent today wandering around wondering if you’re ok.
Track Name: Scribbles and Food Stains
You wrote me a letter in blue ballpoint pen. You said I could be better at being your friend. I know you’ve been through shit, so I must apologise. I didn’t help you through it, I only just realised. Amongst the scribbles and food stains you wrote of music and heartbreak, the inevitability of change and how we’d never end up that way, well... I miss you like fucking crazy. I know you’re just frustrated. I need you to come and save me. I miss you like fucking crazy. Are you lonely? I am alone. One and only, help me atone. And, you said we’d always be friends. Maybe a night of passion would be the end. I really fucking miss you. I really want to kiss you.
Track Name: Yearn
“I spent some time alone”, I said as I finished my drink. “I can’t be on my own, I have too much time to think”. We had a funeral, oh god, I’m scared to death. Are we too young to fall in love again? Is there such a thing as an old flame? I still remember the heartbreak. If we can forgive and move on, baby, I think we’ll be just fine. I’ll be yours, please be mine. I know we hurt ourselves, we hurt each other too. We were stupid then, but my heart yearns for you. I miss waking up with you next to me, can we start making up for lost time?
Track Name: O, Mondegreen!
The morning light brings sweet remorse, crusty eyes. Kiss me now and please don’t cry. Little white lies. We should smoke some cigarettes, cause I don’t care. I think I found my gravity. It’s over there, by your broken silhouette. I have never felt my age; I’m a dog-eared page. I know I won’t be ok. For a while, they say. Flicker, flutter; do I stutter? I’m depressed. You look so pretty in that dress but I’m a mess. Where’s your broken silhouette? Sometimes I forget your name, but I’m glad you came. I hate this hospital food, but I don’t hate you. Sometimes when my nose bleeds, I think of us. Thank god I’m not some nameless boy you never knew. A hopeless letter you’ve never seen. A useless, lifeless mondegreen.
Track Name: Requiem: Louie & Lola (Pt. 2)
The warm glow of the orange morning light
Floods deep into our nest, I kiss your head.
You ask of dreams and if I slept alright.
I dreamt of only you and this twin bed.

The seasons cycle through another year
But when I get home I still hold you close.
I don’t want to be anywhere but here.
Our death is a poem that we compose.

Lola, read to me from your favourite book.
I’ll sit down and play you my favourite song.
I can’t use words to describe how you look
When you grab a guitar and sing along.

Forever will remain our memory:
"Louie & Lola" etched into a tree.